Lots of updates...

It's been a while since I've post, it has been busy!

From an art standpoint I am starting to produce bigger art as seen below:

This last piece is a commission from my daughter and her boyfriend and their new home.

I have since moved my studio back into the house, here it is:

About the house, refinished the front door after removing 80 years worth of paint, am getting a huge about of veggies from the garden:

Getting in better shape, since this time last year I have lost 37 pound, am more active and took on a part time job working with an executive chef to hone my skill in the kitchen, an yeah I can cook!  Working on my first cook book, have my rubs and bbq sauces hitting the market soon.

Picked up this trike so I can tool around town, plus its great exorcise for Crixus.

Gnocchi in an alfredo sauce with summer peppers and garlic toast.

Lamb chops with steamed Brussel sprouts.

Beef street tacos with corn tortillas and a cabbage/carrot slaw on the side, all veggies are from the garden.

Each month I host an event which is by invitation only called Dinner at Karl's.  I create a menu and invite between 30 and 40 people to come over and enjoy some fantastic food.  

On the smoker is bacon wrapped jalapeño stuffed chicken breasts.

July's cook was two 12lb beef brisket, 3 slabs of ribs, potatoes placed under the briskets so as they cooked the juices basted the potatoes.  It was outstanding and I've been told my brisket (using my rub) is the best in Detroit.

I had to cancel Augusts cook because with a recent power outage I had to purchase a generator to run the fridge to save nearly $1000 worth of food.

Septembers cook will be a Moroccan dish called Tagine Chicken and veggies with roasted garlic cuscus, grilled Moroccan style beef kabobs with homemade pita bread and a spicy tahini sauce and finally a cucumber and tomato salad.  I got the tagine pots today.  Learned how to make this dish wile spending time in Morocco with a woman whom I have yet to stop thinking about.  

If you would like to be invited to "Dinner at Karl's" you must friend me on Facebook.  

Having fun and feeling so much better.  Eat healthy, stay active and enjoy life :)

Oh, and I am no longer using twitter, the double standards there are laughable while they let a man, an orange buffoon, insult anyone and everyone, they block you if you have something to say about it!  Twitter no longer has my trust nor support.

What if...

What if the universe is nothing more then the rapid expansion of a supernova, the galaxies we see are nothing more then clumps of atomic matter, the planets molecules, life the result of atoms being blasted out from the inside of a star?  Just as a supernova collapses the universe must also collapse at some point. 

The fact is that we now have dark matter, dark energy to contend with, the expansion is not only real but increasing.  Seemingly with out explanation.  I contend that black holes are like the drain on your laundry tube.  That they (like your drain) will take in as much material as they can and every once and a while we will see the drain get over come with material, thus producing eminence jets of energy, in your drain you see it as a burp of water backing up. 

While the energy emitted from a burping black hole is on a grand scale the amount of energy that is never seen again is so much more grand.  I think this energy, material is providing the seeds for other universes on the other side of that black hole. The dark energy that is causing our universe to expand at in creasing rates is the vacuum of space increasing because the black hole is like a giant drain, the suction of material passing through it is doing so at an increasing rate thus expanding the universe in an ever increasing rate. 

There will come a time when this energy will dissipate and our universe will cease to expand, there will be no more dark energy, there will be no more food for the black holes to use.  Our universe will then collapse back onto itself or should I say into itself.  It will collapse just as a star does, our entire universe crushed to the size of our own sun. 

Food for thought!

The saddest day

To learn that someone you've loved more intensely then anyone else is not who you thought, to experience anothers soul then discover there really was not much there,  to discover that despite all the indications of love, devotion it was empty! 

Today is the saddest day, I've discovered that the person whom I wanted, expected to share a life with was a lie, a fake, wanted nothing but to look out for herself.  I've never required much, never asked for much, gave 100% of my time to her despite the stresses of losing a house, getting divorced, dealing with several close calls with death, I was always there, always on call for her, she could depend on me regardless, no matter what...

I've needed very little from her until recently and have never felt so abandoned in my life, my ex-wife the person whom stated she has hated me for the past 30 years stood by me more intently only eclipsed by my daughter whom I am eternally proud of and love, but to have someone who openly hates me be there even more then a person who stated she loved me more then any/everything... there is something sobering in discovering this.

It is the saddest day because I've discovered that the woman I loved, put on the highest pedestal had nothing in her heart but herself, it is the saddest day because she can't see it, she is so blind to her own self importance that she can't see she has made the ultimate liar out of herself, it's the saddest day because in her words her "conscious is clear", it is the saddest day because without a thought in her head she will go off and do this again to the next guy who pays her that extra bit of attention, while I still have her on a pedestal and hating myself for it!

It is a sad day!

Hope

Is hope a wish or an emotion?

I know that hope is the thing that gets every single person through to the next day:

I hope tomorrow will be better,
I hope I will get that job,
I hope I will get that promotion,
I hope that lottery ticket is a winner,
I hope she will love me,
I hope she will know me,
I hope there is food for tomorrow,
I hope we all are kept safe,
I hope it wont rain,
I hope it will rain,
I hope my favorite band makes a come back,
I hope my team wins in sports,
I hope my next work of art is the one,
I hope I am remembered for who I really am,
I hope you are happy,
I hope you are safe,
I hope tomorrow all of my hopes come true,
I hope...

"Hope springs eternal"

Above all other feelings or emotions, hope is the thing that brings every day to a close,
and it is the only thing that brings the new day in.

Regardless of age, status, sex, wealth, religious belief, political affiliation we hope,
we hope for all the things in our dreams to come true,
we trust that they will,
we have faith that they will,
and even when they don't,
the very next day we think to ourselves...

I hope!

The first one...

It has to be you,
the first one to say,
the things on your mind,
that you love me to.

It has to be you to start a conversation,
I have tried with all my heart,
just to be kept in isolation.

I will stay here for eternity,
because I cannot do more,
so it will have to be you,
the first one to say,
life has been empty,
that something is missing.

It will have to be you,
to send a letter,
confirmation that you exist,
a short note,
one that makes things better,
one that does persist.

It will have to be you,
taking the higher road,
but image the relief,
when you are able to unload,
even if you keep it brief.

Simply put,
it will have to be you...

I long for the day...

I long for the day when you realize we were meant to be,
that regardless of space and time you are here with me,
I long for the day when our hearts are healed,
when both of our fates are eternally sealed.

I long for the day when you are in my arms,
where I can keep you safe from any harm,
I long for the day when our lips once again touch,
because I know you miss me that much.

I long for the day when you come to me and say,
the things once thought are a trillion miles away,
I long for nights of passion and desire,
along with the mornings after,
both of us embracing in a hot shower.

I long for so much because I know it is true,
the love and heart ache that we both have gone through,
I long for you to realize that true love is not sex,
nor time together or the universe as seen from the city,
it is the way we both feel given the possibility,
that our worlds have been altered by the other,
I long for you to finally see that there is no other!

My love is enduring and deep,
it is expressed in my writings,
in my art and in my actions.

Someday you will see the things I long for you to see,
though I know you must in your time, in your way,
with out my presence setting you free,
I long for this day while kneeling on one knee!

Just write me a letter

All you have to do is write me a letter,
it will make you feel better,
I know you have adventures to tell me about,
I know that things have not worked out.

All you have to do is write me a letter,
telling me how thing truly are,
I know that things and words have gone to far,
so take a step and feel better.

All you have to do is write me a letter,
and say the things you want,
write about how you miss our talks,
write about our long walks.

All you have to do is write me a letter,
and you know in your heart,
you will start to feel better,
a hand written note that professes to say,
all the things you think about in a single day.

All you have to do is write me a letter,
I will remind you we are more then most,
that our minds think alike,
much like that photograph of "God is a blue bike".

Below is my address,
you know what to say,
I can tell by your visits,
you have something to tell me,
so if you are brave enough,
all you have to do is write me a letter.

email will not do,
all I ask is a hand written note from you,
and because this should be easy,
language does not matter...

A lost soul

Feeling lost and alone,
hiding in the darkness when the light is on,
remembering the soft touch of skin,
the feeling of being loved within,
it's gone!

Feeling lost and alone,
wandering alone with no help,
feeling the days slip past,
wondering about the last.

Feeling lost and alone,
spending days and nights
working in my studio,
wondering why!

Feeling lost and alone!

Breathing in your poisonous air~

Stranded in a country far away,
I found myself breathing in your poisonous air,
Only thinking of yourself never once going astray,
Beginning to lose sight of what is fair,
I found myself breathing in your poisonous air.

It spreads in me like an infection,
Regardless of intent or direction,
The more I breath your poisonous air,
My lungs fill with pain and despair.

Self absorbed thoughts and actions,
Is your trademark of life's interactions,
Breathing in your poisonous air,
Slowly takes life's forces away,
Leaving me breathless to this day!

Simpler times

Just moments ago were simpler times
when fingers and bodies were intertwined
spent hours in long embraces
with love in our hearts.

In simpler times
we spoke of each other
with laughter in our voices
and desire in our hearts.

Time and travel
love and touch
surroundings become more complex
pressure, distance and jealousies

turn simpler times
into thoughts of pain
love still seeps through
refusing to drain.

Simpler times love never ends
Loves complexity depends the bond
Never breaking even beyond the end.

I wish...

While there are many things I wish,

I wish most to taste you again,
I wish to feel your skin under my finger tips,
I wish to see your eyes widen as you climax,
I wish to hear your voice whispering in my ears.

I wish I could feel what it is like,
to run my finger tips up your legs,
over your hips and just below your breasts.

I wish that my fingers could feel the moist,
swollen lips,
that make you, you.

I wish that you would or even could,
understand how I feel,
or have thought about you.

I sleep every night in a tight embrace,
when we are one,
our bodies united,
as they once were,
me feeling every goose bump,
every ounce of sweat.

I wish that we were united as one,
our flesh tight,
our minds as one,
the things I wish,

the things I wish for you...

Drama Queen

She's always causing a scene
Everywhere she goes
All the money she's spent
She's a little drama queen.

She likes older men
Took them for a ride
All the time trying to hide
What she really was inside.

It was always about her
Hating everything that took your attention
Living her lies
Causing nothing but tension.

She's always causing a scene
Everywhere she goes
All the money she's spent
She's a little drama queen.

Her history looks real bad
Like she wants to stick it to dad
She's moving on to other victims
Left so many in the dust
Feeling like they've been had.

Her troubles they compound
Like all the friends she's left
in a local lost and found
It's hard to imagine nothing but her
Self absorbed and a mean desire to stir.

She's always causing a scene
Everywhere she goes
All the money she's spent
She's a little drama queen.

Love

Love is desire,
admiration,
is a warm body to snuggle with,
dreaming of what could be,
Love is missing you.

Love is far from hate,
has no room for debate,
is beyond arguments,
Love is not born from acts of jealousy.

Love is not sex,
Nor is love meant to perplex,
Love is knowing whatever is true,
So understand when I say,
I love you!

If I could describe the taste of you...

If I could describe the taste of you,
it would taste like the color of midnight blue,
wandering in the mid day sun,
leads to nights of vintage Cosecha red,
where glittering days of midnight sun,
playing with times of proposals undone.

If I could describe the taste of you,
it would be like the earths watery hue,
a giant pearl in the blackness of space,
and life's eternal torment,
regarding the human race.

Notions of love and saving grace,
are filtering moments in the deadness of space,
but the universe is a mysterious place,
giving hope to notions of love and saving grace.

The tasting of you fills my lungs with pleasure,
like finding the universe in your eyes,
and a world of untold treasure,
sweet dreams go by every night,
while notions of tasting you take flight.

We spend our days in the delicate dance of life,
our nights sleeping off drunken strife,
the taste of you imbedded in my soul,
time and aging taking its toll,
all the while trying to describe the taste of you,
wondering what I've got to do,
with these notions of tasting you.

I've spent a lifetime loving you

You know who you are,
The one whose stories with me will be written about,
You know who I am,
I know who you are...

I know if we were talking you would have already called to wish me a happy birthday,
I know you thought of me today because I see you've been here to visit,
I know everyday I am in your thoughts,
I know that you wish things had been different.

I know the truth and so do you,
I know despite our troubles we still desire,
I know the truth in who I am,
I know that everyday I still think of you,
I know the truth in what we had,
I know the truth in what we were supposed to be.

I know the truth!

Do you miss me?

Do you miss me,
the way we touched,
do you miss the laughter,
or do you miss the morning after?

Do you miss me,
the way we kissed,
that our lips fit together,
do you miss the attention,
walking down the street,
do you miss the love so sweet?

Do you miss me,
and the adventure,
do you miss the tenderness,
or the smell of us in the air,
do you miss the passion,
the intensity like no other?

Do you miss me,
do you miss the long talks,
or the long walks,
along rivers of color,
deep reds and blues,
do you miss the things
I loved about you?

Do you miss me?

Sweet dreams...

Sweet Dreams,

I know you're there,
bursting at the seams.

Love so full,
you're about to explode.

I want to say sweet dreams,

because you know in your heart,

That I will always love you~

Does he know?

Does he know?
I am the one you think of during those moments,
the desire in your heart belongs to me,
that your checking my blog for things like this,
something you don't want him to see.

Does he know?
the posts here are signs that I still care,
that they make you sit and stare,
in tender moments you wish it was me with you there.

Does he know?
you've spent days and nights in regret for hurtful words,
that in one week of our passion is a life time of his,
that someday you will want to come back to me.

Does he know?
regardless of what we've been through you still love me,
that you miss my words, my voice,
that he will never know you as I do,
as it should be.

I hate that you...

Still influence my art.
are still the  first thing,
I think of when I start my day,
that I am reminded of you,
because of some object in my sight.

I hate that you,
were able to get this deep,
I hate that I was unable to keep,
the way we were before this time,
when we laughed about the effects
of red wine.

I hat that you got so deep!

The taste of you in the air

The taste of you in the air
brings me to my knees
we spend time making love
with beads of sweat
collecting in our hair.

The room fills with you and I
the taste of you in the air
we laugh and kiss
knowing we are a true love pair.

My sense grow as my fingers
stroke your body
feeling the goose bumps
rise and fall
releasing your scent
and the taste of you in the air.